Mindfulness

Mindfulness is the willingness to accept the truth of each moment.

Moments are dangerous, painful, delirious, filled with satiation. Many moments are dreamy; in some you are zoned out, or sometimes protective. How many tired moments do we have? Then, immersed in activity or asleep we forget about the moments.

Awareness is mindful. Of the dangers, the pleasures: where you will be enticed, or flattered, or hurt; where the simplicity of joy is. Mindfulness is not a garment of light you wear in the world that keeps you connected to infinity no matter what. Rather, mindfulness is not stepping on that land mine. Mindfulness is loving the moment in its brusque complexities. And believing in ultimate benevolence, yes.

Mindfulness is speeding at 200/mph acutely aware of every bump in the road and exactly where the other drivers are. Mindfulness is closing your eyes in the underground and knowing where the other passengers are sitting, what they are wearing, whether they are watching others or drifting in their own dreamy worlds. Mindfulness is copy editing your awareness of the moments you live as you live them.

We are mirrors reflecting the world in our inner landscapes.

We are cameras taking a perpetual film of our lives.

We are directors who edit that film into memories. The themes of the film can change, of course, and then the angles and lighting on the memories changes and shifts as they become part of an expanded design, or sometimes a new one.

Mindfulness is adapting to change. An agility of awareness. Recognizing patterns and where the deviations occur.

Of course, being open to love, loving fully.

                              

The straw that broke the camel's back?

I think the British government is learning that you can't just cut social programs for the poor so that the rest of the populace can maintain their --- lifestyles. Will the riots be a wake-up call? For ethical fiscal management.

Surely the cost of clean-up/rebuilding, over-time for an extended police force, riot-control gear, ammunition etc., and jail and court (for who knows how many when the final count is in after witch hunts through Facebook photos and whatnot) will out weigh the costs of those programs that were rudely cut for those at the bottom of the economic scale.

There is obviously some power in the anger of the downtrodden. Too bad it's anarchy. Britain right now is almost in a situation of civil war - between unemployed youth and an employed middle class. (The upper classes are probably all vacationing out of the country.)

I'm not saying I support the riots, not at all, and I'd be one of those mothers yelling at the kids smashing and burning and stealing, but I surely don't support the fiscal decisions of the government cutting funding to centres and programs for these young people either.

The straw that broke the camel's back?

                              

Marriage Separation Ritual

Five-pointed mandala star with inscribed symbols, 1997, found in a journal, probably watercolour pencil, markers and acrylics, though I don't know for sure, and small, 10.5cm x 16cm, 6" x 6.25"

Here is the entry that follows the image in my journal:

April 26, 1997

We legally separated on Thursday, April 24th during a "Separation Ritual" at my house with a number of friends (John, Janet, Chris, Sally, Anne, Ingrid, Theo). John and Janet, who were our witnesses at our marriage, also witnessed our separation.

It was quite lovely. We began with group drumming, as well as rattles and bells. The drumming was a means to creating a sacred space, clearing the day we'd had, getting in touch with our underlying rhythms, creating a group bond.

Then we sat in a circle and I talked about how we were commemorating the completion of a cycle and the beginning of a new one. That Brian and I had known each other since 1974, for 23 years, that we were friends long before our 3 years of living together, and our 12 years of marriage, that our relationship was not ending but only transforming as we begin a new phase.

I said that I felt that the theme we were working with was one of forgiveness and release.

And I offered Brian some gifts of the heart:

• self-renewal
• self-confidence
• inner strength
• fun money

I also said that I wished to honour each other as parents of the two beautiful children we share.

He thanked me for each gift, affirmed our need to keep things clear, and offered me some gifts:

• self-worth
• stability
• success
• integration of life and spiritual path
• happiness

Then we signed the Separation Agreement, marking the point between our past relationship and our future one. Our witnesses signed each copy.

After we had spoken and finalized the legal agreement, each person in the circle (with one exception, a person who remained silent throughout) offered us a blessing.

Afterwards we drank wine and ate h'ordeuvres, enjoying the gathering of our gentle friends.