On Invisibility

For me to keep everything in one place. I do apologize, but I'm at a point where I need to keep my poetry beyond the reach of certain people who have plucked from my work here and there as it pleases them as if they were vultures and I a fresh carcass.

(An image one of them will probably lift. I cannot imagine being so bereft of words and having to literally steal; or, alternatively, being so desperate to appear 'brilliant' that you have to trawl poets on the Internet for whatever you can scavenge.)

On Invisibility

Notes on My Mother's Death

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The Beautiful and the Damned - Who is Who?

I've begun a new journal and have been using graphite and charcoal powder. I particularly like this drawing. There is a synergy between the figures, who are together but not gazing at each other, that captivates me. And if you look closely, you, too, will see that it is simply not possible to decide Who is the Beautiful and Who is the Damned. Either could be either.

I loved the remnants of the powder I had smeared on to begin molding the faces in the paper, and so have included those earlier photos. The first one is of the finished drawing. There is a silvery-pewter quality to the drawing, the way the light catches that, that is hard to photograph, but I've done my best.

 Final.

 Final, detail.

 In-process.

In-process, detail.

Beautiful and Damned - Who Is Who? Brenda Clews, 2013, 16" x 10", graphite and ink, 

in a Premium C.D. Japanese Notebook (the paper is like silk).

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The launch of 'luminist poems' went well

I was so nervous I nearly didn't go! My daughter got me there. That was an unexpected reaction. I've been doing open mic for perhaps 6 months almost weekly, and had a few poetry features, and of course have a wack of videos, and I was so stressed I wanted to cancel out of the launch of my first book. You learn something new about yourself every day, I tell you!

It's hard to be present for dear friends with whom you are talking when the crowd around you is in your ears. When you are more of a one-on-one person who likes to get in to actual conversations, the requirements of meet and greet can be a little difficult. I hope I made everyone who came out for the launch feel as special as they felt to me.

Once the readings began, it was okay. Patrick Connors, who launched his chapbook, Scarborough Songs, went first, then me, and Lisa Young closed the evening with readings from her chapbook, This Cabin. They were great. We had been such a team for the promo, it was super to launch with them, and almost a bit sad after, as Lisa said, "Now that the launch is over, it feels a bit like we are breaking up."

My book, the luminist poems, is beautifully produced -Luciano Iacobelli, who hand-crafts all the chapbooks his Press, LyricalMyrical, publishes did a superb job, as always. A decent number of copies were sold. He hosted a warm, comfortable, loving evening of great poetry, camaraderie, and sharing in the best of literary traditions.

Everyone clapped after every single poem each one of us read! It seems so excessive, everyone clapping loudly after each poem, and yet there is such an enthusiasm for poetry in our 'niche' world. Poetry in Toronto rocks, it really does.

I went in terrified and came out the other end of the hours in a warm glow that lasted well into the early hours as I went with a few friends to a friend's apartment to celebrate.

My dear sweet niece, Freya Clews, gave me flowers. The flowers match my favourite lace dress! Almost my whole family came. I am so lucky! And many beautiful friends. All I can say is thank you! xoxoxoxo

My daughter, son and brother helped me take down my show today, and all the paintings are at home. Lots of lovely responses, but, no, no sales. Q Space, being a poetry cafe, I wasn't expecting to sell, but thought that having a show was a good thing for me at this point. You can see my paintings in the photographs - Luciano was kind enough to make sure that the show and the launch co-incided. My brother, Allan, took some fine video too, so I may post that at some point just because.

All in all, a fine experience; it's been an intense month with a solo show and preparations for and then the launch, and I am quite ready to retire from 'be'in public' for awhile! (Though I am a featured poet at two upcoming poetry events, so not totally!)

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Git Yer Socks Movin'!

Many thanks to all of you who are coming. Big hugs!!! And the rest of you? Git yer socks moving to Q this Thurs! Lol!!

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Invite to Chapbook Launch/Art Show this Thursday evening in Toronto

Dear friends,

June is a beautiful month. I hope you are enjoying the vibrance of Spring.

I am happy to invite you to a launch this Thursday night. LyricalMyrical Press is publishing my chapbook, called, 'the luminist poems.' The launch is being held at Q Space, a poetry cafe in Toronto, with two other wonderful poets, Lisa Young and Pat Connors.

Thurs June 13th

7:30 - 10pm

Q Space

382 College St 

(between Bathurst & Spadina,  street parking in area, map below)
Q Space offers tea, coffee, desserts and a cash bar.

'the luminist poems,' by Brenda Clews, a romance, its dazzling and dangerous light, questions the paradoxes of who we are before the text blazes into visionary rapture. "Brenda Clews offers us a pellucid voice that presents and interprets so clearly, it is almost as if light is shining through each one of the magnificent images in these mysterious poems." -John F. Walter 

My POEMPAINTINGS art show will still be up at Q Space (until the 14th, the next day).

I do hope you can make it. I would love to see you!
warm regards, love, Brenda

ps. A video of Lisa, Pat and I reading a poem or two, a little preview of our launch this coming Thursday evening:

http://youtu.be/50JOPlpWJsI

Map:

Toronto, ON M5T 1S8, Canada

Show on Google Maps

-

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'For decisions and revisions'

'For decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse,' a line from TS Eliot's, "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock," 2013, 8" x 10", graphite and ink, in a Premium C.D. Japanese Notebook (the paper is like silk).

Then Dean R. Vincent has offered an even better line, "And so it stays just at the edge of vision/a small unfocused blur, a standing chill/that slows each impulse down to indecision." Larkin, 'Aubade.'

As I built the figure, he looked very eery, but came more into form when I added some B pencil lines, also lilac pencil and then red ink.

The second photo I took with the drawing angled in the sun so you can see some of the texture.

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Nik Beat on his Collage Art Shows, interviewed by Brenda Clews

direct link: Interview with Nik Beat on his Collage Art Shows

Nik Beat is a well-known Toronto poet, musician, and radio host; what most people don't know is that he is also a Collage artist. An "Inner View" with Nik Beat, who currently has two Collage Art Shows. One at Gallery Catalyst, 666 Queen St W, Toronto; and the other at the Grackle Coffee Company, 208 Main St, Schomberg, Ontario. An interesting interview on his show, "Famous for Falling" - on pop icons who hit bad times or opted out of life altogether. He talks about his Marilyn Monroe collage (one with JFK in it), Elvis Presley, Francis Farmer, even Jesus Christ. He does get a wee bit graphic at one point, so listen without children in earshot. He talks about the rigorous requirements of Gallery Catalyst in Toronto, surely a unique way of getting artists to produce, and their way of showing and selling art. And a little of his show in Shomberg, where his larger collage that took 2 years to finish, 'Sex for Sale' is on exhibit. I enjoyed interviewing the interviewer (he does a weekly show on poetry, spoken word and music at CIUT 89.5FM)! Hope you enjoy listening as much as I did!

(cover photo is also mine from when he did a collage at Nuit Blanche 2011)!

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A Selection of Poempaintings' Art Show up at Q Space in Toronto until June 15th

'A Selection of Poempaintings' Art Show is still up at Q Space in Toronto until June 15th. Two people have shown interest in purchasing two of the paintings, which is nice whether anything crystallizes or not. Otherwise, I have received many wonderful compliments and overheard people saying, 'I really like these paintings,' without them knowing I am the artist, kind of lovely to then introduce myself. People have been taking cell phone pics, and sitting to read the 14 page Gallery Guide I created, which, again, is a bit overwhelming. I'm not used to such attention!

An artist who came to my Gallery Opening party said every piece "had integrity." He went on to explain that many artists discover a style and then keep doing it and that you can recognize their paintings because they are all very similar. He pointed to the walls, "Yours are all distinct, different from each other." I, who am not good with accepting compliments, especially ones like this, countered, "But they're all of a single figure, well, except that one, and that..." "Yes," he said, "But they are not virtually carbon copies of each other." And, you know, I worked very hard to ensure my show would have that variety, and yes, it was gratifying to encounter someone who remarked on it.

It's a beautiful Spring here in Toronto...

[If you would like to enquire about prices or purchase prints, please check out my Poempaintings Gallery at FineArt America.]

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Not sure what is going on with this blog, but I find I cannot post any poetry here anymore or even talk about the process of writing poetry. I dearly wish my work hadn't become raw fodder for a certain group of may I say rather arrogant poets because it hurt me to see what was happening and has subsequently caused me to encrypt my poetry in this blog, this dear blog of 9 years, my on-line home.

For sincere and honest readers who may reference or borrow but who always cite their sources, I do apologize.

For those who believe stealing is permissible because Oscar Wilde said so (he made a joke, he was good at that, but his writing is original, his own, he did not, himself, steal from other writers), a hex on ye!

encrypted text

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Notes on My Mother's Death (from my Moleskine)

[from my Moleskine, dated March 27th, 2013]

encrypted poem

[I have not posted poetry here in ages because of some problems with some of my 'hidden' readers. To them: Do *not steal away my images *or their intent without crediting me or else I will stop posting poetry publicly on this site for good - those of you who do this likely think I don't know but you are wrong - even if it's 6 months later, I know exactly what you are doing, so stop it]

Postscript: Sorry, I am not able to post my poetry here anymore due to [these] people who think Oscar Wilde himself stole, when he merely made a joke

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'Three Poets, Three Chapbooks, Three Visions' video is finally live!

direct link: Three Poets, Three Chapbooks, Three Visions

Simply cannot believe that this video is finally live! Wow, what I've been through with buggy FCP X! The video is simply done: Lisa Young reads two poems from her forthcoming chapbook; I read a prose poem; and Pat Connors reads two poems. Then animated blurbs on our chapbooks with the cover photos. And finally the three chapbooks with the website of the publisher, LyricalMyrical Press. And credits, thanking Luciano Iacobelli, the publisher. I only played a wee bit with colour (Lisa and Pat are, um, rather bright and I'm more black and white) and some, uh, sidelights. :) ::laughing delightedly:: Enjoy a lovely poetry reading in the comfort of where you are. And, if you're in, or near, Toronto on June 13th, come to Q Space at 382 College for the launch!

Also, I put the launch date and so on in a few YouTube "Annotated Notes." Quite fun, I tell you. But I can remove them after June 13th, and then the video will remain to float around YouTube in the years to come, itself launched. :)

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Final Cut Pro X continues to cause migraines

Final Cut Pro X is freezing again as I attempt to re-do one clip, which I have thus far been unable to match to what I had achieved in the prior version. My editing is an unfollowable path. I get so deep into it, I couldn't tell you how I got to where I get in the end. Hopefully re-doing this particular clip (even if I can't get to where I got before the trouble started) from scratch, the one that seems to be causing all the problems, will work and I can save it out to a file recognizable by YouTube. The clip I copied in to compare it to just froze the whole project, though. And I had to 'force quit' FCP X once again. So fatigued with all this, days and days of it.

And the worst of it is that I went on-line with the 'error code' (which I do not remember now), and found advice in the Apple Support Communities to delete all the render files associated with the project that refuses to share its video to a .mov file. I downloaded the QuickTime codecs recommended. Deleted FCP X. Re-installed it. Re-opened my project. All was there, except when I go into the files with Finder, all my files, the text, the images, everything is gone. It's pretty much a total disaster.

Then I ran out of batteries - I'm using my 46" TV screen as a monitor - for the wireless trackpad, so used the ones from the wireless keyboard and plugged that into some contraption I got from BestBuy with some of their BestBuy money that is a dock that re-charges the re-chargeable battery pack it comes with, using up the usb port that I could plug the original ext HDD into that I began the project on to see if all the original files still exist there, or if they, too, have been trashed in my attempt to get this sorry program, FCP X, to do its job properly. And I can't find the USB hub I got at a small computer store that even my old and dear iMac didn't like and wouldn't read serious programs from.

I used FCE for nearly 5 years, and never had a whisper of a problem with it. But it won't open these FCP X 10.0.8 files. I think FCP X a colossal waste of money at this point. I have never in all the years I've used Apple products experienced anything like this.

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