Friday, August 25, 2006

Looking back aways...





Not a trip down memory lane, but sort of. I discovered my daughter had taken these photos out of the albums we recently excavated to show her friends, and I was touched. In the process of scanning...

In 1977, at 25 years of age. Ah, the world ahead! My first relationship of 5 years that had become a marriage was ending. A late bloomer, I didn't go to university till 21; I was working on my second B.A. and getting straight A's. When I look at these photos, I think I knew more then than now.

Did we all start from a position of surity that has gradually crumbled away? Leaving an essential glimmer in the unknowingness?

7 comments:

  1. You are amazingly beautiful here ... compelling. From these beginnings you have become the seasoned beauty who shares now from abundance... thank you. -mg

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  2. I think I've gotten my bearings much better as I've aged... but that has to do with centering, with balance, not with surity. I am not sure I was ever sure. ;-)

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  3. I guess the more we learn, the more we realize there is so much more to know. Beautiful pictures of you!

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  4. Aw, shucks, Mary, that's nice of you to say.

    MB, I'm afraid it's true, I was always right then, glad to say that's no longer true... but now I have a daughter who's always right, which is quite fabulous.

    Ester, life becomes more mysterious the older I get, somehow cleared of what's not essential. Sometimes I think it's a glimmer of light in the darkness - a darkness that is itself warm and loving.

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  5. I've been thinking about this a little more. I wonder if there isn't some courage involved in this. Courage to not know everything. Sometimes we get braver with experience. I like how you speak of a glimmer of light in the darkness that is itself warm and loving.

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  6. Perhaps it's my fifth decade. Such a shift went on during the past few years, it's left me not just grappling with uncertainty, but sure that I am no longer sure. I have fewer, if any, answers than ever before in my life. If that makes any sense...

    Meaning, I think, MB, we are talking from different perspectives in the time it takes to live our lives.

    Or it's just where I'm presently finding myself. It's not in any way an uncomfortable place.

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  7. Extraordinary and beautiful photos. I left my first marriage at 24 and was operating under my own steam truly for the first time. I remember the tremendous desire and potential of those years. I still have them, but they've transmuted with age. I'm more confident, but also more mellowed. In some ways I'm less courageous, but in other ways I'm more, I think.

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A Pulsing Imagination - Ray Clews' Paintings

A video of some of my late brother Ray's paintings and poems I wrote for them. Direct link: https://youtu.be/V8iZyORoU9E ___